Are You Wearing A Helmet? - An Actual Play RPG
78 episodes
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Creator: Keith Allen and the Gang
Full cast Fantasy Longform Audio RPG
Synopsis:
The gang is off on one heck of a ride, rolling through a world of fantasy, fun, and failures. With dungeons, dragons, bad guys, and these so called Heroes there is no telling what will happen next. Join us on this actual play D&D podcast as our adventurers seek out fame, fortune, and a clue.
Language: English
Format: Audio RPG
Continuity: Longform
Writing: Improvised
Voices: Full cast
Genres: Fantasy
Maturity: Mature
Not tagged: [RPG system] [Creator demographics] [Character demographics] [Country of origin] [Transcript] [Completion status] [Content warnings]
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Episodes:
Sun, 29 May 2016 14:25:46 -0400
The party is introduced and find themselves the Eadaran equivalent of interns. A tale of blood sport,betrayal and mint juleps.
Episode 2: In the Depths of the Old City
Sun, 29 May 2016 14:32:48 -0400
Our heroes find themselves deep within the ruins of the once great metropolis in search of a long lost plot device. A tale of mutants, stench and unsavory feasts.
Episode 3: Dungeoneering for Fun & Profit
Sun, 29 May 2016 14:40:02 -0400
Concluding our party's journey into the shadow-wreathed remains of Old Sheresh. A tale of ghoulish deprivations,buttery mockery, and time wasting shopping trips.
Episode 4: They Only Come Out at Night
Sun, 29 May 2016 14:46:08 -0400
Where the party learns the value of altruism, and find themselves helping those that can't help themselves. A tale of what happens if they eat after midnight, summoned atrocities, and handouts most boring.
Episode 5: Our Dinner with Dimitrios
Fri, 24 Jun 2016 01:45:09 -0400
How do our heroes handle themselves at the table of their foe? If you guessed poorly, you'd be mostly correct. A tale of inside jokes with outside voices, arson for a good cause,and a cult of chains.
Fri, 29 Jul 2016 08:00:00 -0400
Deciding to enter the hotel business, the group makes a deal with an old acquaintance. A tale of maritime mingling, desperate belay pin throwing, and a lesson in humility.
Fri, 26 Aug 2016 12:05:10 -0400
The party confronts an ancient evil to protect their charges, and show that the ocean isn't the only place that's salty. A tale of the drowned dead, idols most grotesque, and fated armor.
Episode 8: The Trail of the Red Priest
Fri, 30 Sep 2016 07:11:00 -0400
When the party tries to organize an expedition to find a lost city, they discover that their enemies have allies.Hunted by a priest of Hate, the group seek to turn the tables on their foe. A tale of biting flies, monkey waiters, and table chatter gone wild.
Basement of Terror 1: The Willows
Fri, 28 Oct 2016 07:11:00 -0400
In keeping with the season, Are You Wearing A Helmet is proud to present our first fangtastic, spooktacular Halloween special Basement of Terror 1: The Willows. Join Ken "Rotting" Rau, Chris "Cadaver" Card, Eric Deadniewski, Rick "I Have Four Children Under the Age of Ten" Dubridge, and our special guest Keith "Axe Murderer" Allen as they investigate the strange and macabre. A tale of bad accents, taciturn old men, and things that go bump in the night.
Fri, 25 Nov 2016 06:11:00 -0500
Hot on the trail of a cultist, the party finds there are older, darker things lurking in the shadows of Sheresh. Will the group be willing to bargain with an ancient, eldritch force to track down their quarry? A tale of blood, the eccentricity of artists, and silent orphans.
Episode 10: A Return to the Ruins
Fri, 30 Dec 2016 06:11:00 -0500
In this extra long episode, the party finds themselves strong-armed into the broken remnants of Old Sheresh by the strangest beings they've met yet. A tale of brains gone bad, the oddest of pets, and how trusting the structural integrity of old buildings isn't the best of plans.
Fri, 27 Jan 2017 06:11:00 -0500
As the party tries to find a way to escape from the dead city of Old Sheresh they find a new ally. They'll need all the help they can get as they find themselves in the middle of an undead feud. A tale of stylish fashion, dwarven anatomy, and dark waters.
Episode 12: Fight to the Surface
Fri, 24 Feb 2017 06:11:00 -0500
The party finds itself in a desperate situation as it's surrounded on all sides by the undead hordes of ancient Sheresh. A tale of rot, free range Morlocks, and black water rafting.
Episode 13: We're On a Mission from Meloc
Fri, 31 Mar 2017 11:35:28 -0400
The party barely has time to catch its breath before being confronted by their most annoying foe yet. Can the party rescue their dwarven allies or will it degenerate into a flopping, steaming mess? If you've listened this far I'm sure you can guess. A tale of vain Vikings, wizard street fighting, and suplexes.
Fri, 28 Apr 2017 01:55:00 -0400
With all the foresight and stealth it's known for, the party attempts to break into their foe's lair and rescue a family of innocents. A tale of extortion, invisible dwarves, and petty vandalism.
Episode 15: The Imp of the Perverse
Fri, 26 May 2017 01:55:00 -0400
Disguised, the party mingles among the lowest of high Sheresh society, where oddities are the norm. A tale of Eric impressions, troll bits, and impudent deals.
Episode 16: Through A Passage Darkly
Fri, 30 Jun 2017 01:55:00 -0400
Finding a hidden escape route, the party finds itself exploring an area sealed for centuries, along with secrets and ancient treasure. A tale of sullen rangers, crystalline janitors, and jarred threats.
Fri, 28 Jul 2017 01:55:00 -0400
The party finds itself deep within the very sanctum of Captain Erksson in an episode so action and comedy packed that we had to shorten it lest we burn out your excitement centers. A tale of melting pots, feathered friends, and silver (bar) linings.
Episode 18: Sailors on the Sea of Sands
Fri, 25 Aug 2017 01:55:00 -0400
The party strikes out on an expedition to find a forgotten city, and more importantly, whatever treasure is still in said city. A tale of cheap labour, strange questions, and kobold arms deals.
Fri, 29 Sep 2017 01:55:00 -0400
The party sets out to rescue kidnapped members of its expedition from the servants of a strange and ancient evil. What will the group find atop of a brooding stone tower called the Devil's Tooth? A tale of pilfered potions, deadly discs, and savage simians.
Basement of Terror 2: Tomb of Horrors
Fri, 27 Oct 2017 01:55:00 -0400
Welcome back boils and ghouls to our second Halloween special. Join Chris "Corpse" Card, Ken "Revolting" Rau, Eric "WOOOOOOO" Wisiewski, and Rick Doombridge along with our special guests Keith "Chemtrails are a Freemason Plot" Allen and Rob "Murderous" Mountney as they venture into a terrifying blast from the past: The Tomb of Horrors. A tale of monkey rafts, a lethally polite paladin, and oh so many pit traps.
Episode S2.1: A Shadow on the Sand
Fri, 24 Nov 2017 01:43:43 -0500
The party finds itself back to its rescuing ways as it braves ancient, shunned ruins for the sake of three overconfident teenagers. Not to be nice mind you, but mostly because Rick doesn't want to pay a tariff. A tale of tenebrous tendrils, the bones of ancient heroes, and dancing golems.
Episode S2.2: An Inconvenient Tooth
Fri, 29 Dec 2017 00:55:00 -0500
What mysteries and perils await the party as it ventures into a blasphemous mockery of Merrick's church? Well, let's just say you're probably going to want to turn your volume down in the last ten minutes. A tale of undead scribblers, unwholesome gardens, and maniacal dentists.
Episode S2.3: Master of Puppets
Fri, 26 Jan 2018 20:03:43 -0500
The party rounds into the home stretch as they confront the true evil behind the curse of the Ruins. Also Ken gets to live out his sound effect dreams. Please don't encourage him by liking it. A tale of twisted temples, melancholy marionettes, and father issues.
Episode S2.4: Pirating the Past
Fri, 23 Feb 2018 00:55:00 -0500
A chance encounter with an old class mate leads the party into a quest for fortune and glory. A tale of ophidian invaders, archery duels, and greed driven mages that aren't Rick.
Episode S2.5: Dead Man's Dance
Fri, 30 Mar 2018 01:55:00 -0400
Plunging into the lost crypt of a legendary king, the party finds that even the deceased are leery of giving up their loot. A tale of cultured sphinxes, salmon leaping monks, and one very, very long fight.
Sat, 28 Apr 2018 01:55:00 -0400
Out of the frying pan and into the fire (if the fire was a bunch of spear wielding piles of calcium) the party finds itself fighting another skeletal phalanx as it tries to plumb the secrets of Anki's tomb. A tale of endless quivers, ossified bets, and the slow roll of plot points.
AYWAH Bonus: There Really Are Charts for Everything
Fri, 25 May 2018 11:27:11 -0400
A Random Dungeon Are You Wearing a Helmet adventure: Join us for an extra special session of the podcast where the whole group gets to break out the 1st and 2nd Edition books and ride the waves of probability. An adventure so special you get five morons for the price of four. A tale of interrupted character stories, Team Bob, "sleeping" orcs, and how to really influence people.
Fri, 29 Jun 2018 01:55:00 -0400
The party finds itself fighting opponents that can't be bargained with. That can't be reasoned with and don't feel pity, remorse, or fear. Will the party be terminated? Listen to find out. A tale of dazzled eyes, the perils of grave robbing, and a whole boatload of constructs.
Fri, 27 Jul 2018 01:55:00 -0400
With its cleric turned into even more of a babbling imbecile how will the party fare against the traps and guardians of Anki's Tomb? Judging from Eric's die rolling in this episode, the outlook is grim. A tale of historical motherlodes, Ashirian social niceties, and hungry, hungry statues.
Episode S2.9: On the Road Again
Fri, 31 Aug 2018 01:55:00 -0400
The party finds itself finally free of the Tomb of Anki and back on the trail to the Oasis of the Weeping Woman, along with a whole new rules system for Rick to not learn. A tale of converts, mushroom men, and spore visions.
Fri, 28 Sep 2018 01:55:00 -0400
As the party makes its way across the burning sands they encounter a strange new find: a dwarven hermit with some bitter teachings for the party's resident monk archer. A tale of insults, a very happy Chris and unexpected displays of friendship.
Basement of Terror 3: The Unbasementing
Fri, 26 Oct 2018 01:55:00 -0400
Join us as we explore strange new vistas of horror, non Euclidean geometry, and slime girt cyclopean ruins as we play the horror classic RPG Call of Cthulhu. A tale of sleep deprived GMs. deadly furniture, and why Rick will never. ever be allowed to play a character with a gun again.
Episode S2.11: A Snake in the Grass
Fri, 30 Nov 2018 00:55:00 -0500
The party finds that the Oasis of the Weeping Woman isn't as abandoned as expected. A tale of dancing lights, juggling rangers, and a captivating beauty.
Fri, 28 Dec 2018 00:55:00 -0500
You asked and the guys answered. We answer a few questions from the mail bag during this intimate sessions of sharing. From magic latrine bags, Chris Card's most angry moment, and why Rick plays doesn't play video games. Just remember, you did ask.
Episode S2.12: A Hiss From The Past
Fri, 25 Jan 2019 00:55:00 -0500
As the party explores the ruins of the Oasis, they find that they aren't alone. A tale of how three heads are more dangerous then one, old campaign tales, and dangers of becoming tainted.
Fri, 22 Feb 2019 00:55:00 -0500
The party finds itself fighting a subterranean terror. A tale of stable wizards, dirty trolls and damage resistance: pointy things.
Episode S2.14: A Citadel Strong
Fri, 29 Mar 2019 01:55:00 -0400
After months of travel, trouble, and trials the party nears its destination. A tale of visceral spies, bizarre games, and living legends.
Episode S2.15: Friendship is Magic
Sat, 27 Apr 2019 13:26:39 -0400
The party begins to make the rounds in the city of true minotaurs. A tale of cow jokes, life lessons, and luxuriating dwarves.
Episode S2.16: A Sword's Story
Fri, 31 May 2019 01:55:00 -0400
Arkadios learns a bit more of his past from the minotaurs of the city of Gnossos. A tale of history lessons, Rick's Rules of the Road, and just how tall Ken is, or isn't.
Episode S2.17: A Ringing Endorsement
Fri, 30 Aug 2019 06:55:00 -0400
After a summer hiatus we join the party as it finds out more backstory that it'll be sure to soon forget. A tale of poisonous gas clouds, DMs that can't add, and a glimpse of the past.
Episode S2.18: Djinn and Tonic
Fri, 04 Oct 2019 01:55:00 -0400
Things heat up for the party as it faces a genie that grants wishes, so long as those wishes are pain. A tale of fire, smoke and minotaur cheerleaders
Basement of Terror 4: A Pack Of Lies
Thu, 31 Oct 2019 01:55:00 -0400
Join us for a howling good time as we explore the northern wilds of Michigan and the all too primal horror it contains. Can the gang unlock the mystery before carnage, blood lust, and greed overwhelm them all? It's a tale of things that hide in the wild, bad accents, and harsh mockery of the producer whose only crime is trying to bring joy to others. (No, it's fine. I'm sure he's over it.)
Basement of Terror 5: The Death House Part One
Fri, 30 Oct 2020 05:55:00 -0400
Join us for a romp through the D&D module, The Death House. Can the gang find their way back out before the mystery of the house and the greed of their souls trap them forever? It's a tale of creepy houses, bad descriptions, and questionable moral ethics of "heroic" adventurers.
Basement of Terror 5: The Death House Part Two
Fri, 30 Oct 2020 06:30:00 -0400
The continuing romp through the D&D module, The Death House. Can the gang find their way back out before the mystery of the house and the greed of their souls trap them forever? It's a tale of creepy houses, bad descriptions, and questionable moral ethics of "heroic" adventurers.
Fri, 04 Dec 2020 05:55:00 -0500
After a not so brief hiatus, the gang returns to the table to start a new brave story. Keith Allen takes the reins and learns the folly of his choices. It's a tale of long box text, thin back stories, and heavy fat shaming.
Episode S3.2: Merchants and Markets
Fri, 18 Dec 2020 05:55:00 -0500
The gang comes dangerously close to moving the story along. A trip to the Iron Bar turns to a row in the streets. It's a tale of terrible smells, shrewd commodity investments , and not so warm welcomes.
Episode S3.3: Street Fight At Three Coppers Inn
Fri, 01 Jan 2021 05:55:00 -0500
The gang nearly arrives at The Three Coppers Inn. But not before a gang of street thugs tries desperately to make this story interesting. It's a tale of street gangs, misunderstood rules, and halfling jeers.
Episode S3.4: His Name Is Simon
Fri, 02 Apr 2021 05:55:00 -0400
The gang finally arrives at The Three Coppers Inn...and once again make friends and influence people. It's a tale of poor note taking, awkward character meetings, and a lesson in wizard defense training.
Fri, 16 Apr 2021 05:55:00 -0400
The gang follows up on some leads concerning their latest troubles. It's a tale of questionable interrogation practices, obscure halfling facts, and wattle and daub.
Fri, 19 Aug 2022 05:55:00 -0400
The gang finally confronts their would be assassins in their own lair. It's a tale of poor planning, volatile chemicals, and of course, even more obscure halfling facts.
Episode S3.7: That’s Mr Plothammer
Fri, 26 Aug 2022 18:47:00 -0400
The gang returns to their lead with some questions and finds a new ally. It's a tale of traitors with old names, a thrilling chase, and new friends with clear directions.
Episode S3.8: Milling About The Riverside
Fri, 02 Sep 2022 05:55:00 -0400
The gang goes mission implausible as the plan an attack on the local thieves guild. It's a tale of fishing, expert cart driving, and as always, even more obscure halfling facts.
Episode S3.9: A ”Hole” lot of Trouble
Fri, 16 Sep 2022 05:55:00 -0400
The gang continues deeper into the depths of the mill only to discover more even more peril. It's a tale of navigating tunnels, terrible rolls, and ingenious halfling traps.
Episode S3.10: Not Your Run of the Mill Dungeon
Fri, 30 Sep 2022 05:55:00 -0400
The gang delves into the heart of the Mill's basement. It's a tale of new rules, product placement, and challenging rope ladders.
Thu, 03 Nov 2022 20:43:27 -0400
Better late than never, it's Happy Halloween to all our ghoulish listeners! Join us in our annual treat in which our heroes harass an old woman, a halfling is denied a monster girl harem, electrical shocks are administered, and real estate is "acquired".
Episode S3.11: The Call of the Pink Castle
Fri, 01 Mar 2024 05:55:00 -0500
The gang receives a come hither summons to the pink castle. It's a tale of questionable building materials, our love for the state of Florida, and all new and improved halfling lore.
Episode S3.12: Are You Wearing an Apron?
Fri, 01 Mar 2024 06:00:00 -0500
The party finds itself deep within the larder of the Pink Castle's kitchen talking of people, pickles, and pasties. (It's a Michigan meat pie, no really google it.) It's a tale of traps, undead, and cheating the wrong way.
Episode S3.13: Dancing with the Dead in the Crystal Ballroom
Fri, 01 Mar 2024 06:04:00 -0500
The the gang finds an ominous magic item before entering a strange room filled with armored dead. It's a tale of new loot, accident prone halflings, and not so subtle advertising.
Episode S3.14: The Quest for the Black Cup
Fri, 01 Mar 2024 06:05:00 -0500
The party finds itself even deeper within the larder of the Pink Castle's kitchen celebrating Chris Card's birthday. It's a tale of dungeon crawling, clanking teeth, and a plethora magical items.
Episode S3.15: Battle of the Bones
Fri, 01 Mar 2024 06:10:00 -0500
The party finds itself faced with horde of undead deep in the bowels of the of the Pink Castle's kitchen. It's a tale of bad combat rules, daddy issues, and really bad jokes. Nothing out of the ordinary there really.
Episode S3.16: Epic Rat Battles
Fri, 01 Mar 2024 06:15:00 -0500
The struggle continues as the party finds itself fighting a pack of undead rats. It's a tale of brave clerics, Rat Bite Fever, and halfling horn blowing. You don't want to miss this one, the end is a blast!
Episode S3.18: An Exchange Between Gentlemen
Fri, 28 Jun 2024 05:55:00 -0400
After great cost, the party finds itself within reach of its goal. But, a pleasantly polite adversary stands in the way. It's a tale of witty banter, "new" friends, and noble conversation.
Episode S3.19: New Hires and the Importance of the Interview Process
Fri, 12 Jul 2024 05:55:00 -0400
The gang's success has finally been noticed by employment recruiters. Will they take the offer of a full time gig? It's a tale of shred pre employment negotiations, supply closet looting, and grounds for immediate dismissal.
Episode S3.20: On the Road Again
Fri, 26 Jul 2024 05:55:00 -0400
The gang once again escapes any real consequences and heads out for adventure once again. It's a tale of de-funding the police, obvious ambushes, and a plethora of dice rolling.
Episode S3.21: Pearls Before Swine
Fri, 09 Aug 2024 05:55:00 -0400
The gang is once again lured off task by nobles offering gold and a chance to live high on the hog. It's a tale of noble banter, ham-fisted plot hooks, and the indiscretions of a state backed religion.
Episode S3.22: The Painful Investigation Of A Burning Problem
Fri, 23 Aug 2024 05:55:00 -0400
The gang tries to find some answers to their burning questions about a death in town. It's a tale of aimless questions, confusing answers, and House of Stanmire lore.
Episode S3.23: A Deep Subject For Shallow Minds
Fri, 06 Sep 2024 05:55:00 -0400
The gang travels to Deepwell to resolve the burning problem. It's a tale of terrible plans, waylaying midwives, and stealing vegetables.
Fri, 25 Oct 2024 05:55:00 -0400
Happy Halloween once again to all our ghoulish listeners! Join us in our (semi) annual treat in which our heroes rescue a unikaren, handle poopomancy, and battle skilletons. This one is scary on a different level.
Episode S3.24: A Stone Church in an Obfusacting Night
Fri, 03 Jan 2025 05:55:00 -0500
The gang finally makes it to the center of town only to rediscover many of the previous details they had forgotten. It's a tale of questioning exposition, failed party splits, and a deep halfling filled plot hole.
Episode S3.25: Flush Twice It's A Long Way Down
Fri, 17 Jan 2025 05:55:00 -0500
The gang is unable to resist dark places and decides to investigate the infamous watering hole in the town of Deepwell. It's a tale of spelunking, fae traps, and a pixie terrorist.
Episode S3.26: PC Politics in the Pixie Palace
Fri, 31 Jan 2025 05:55:00 -0500
The gang storms the pixie palace and fails miserably at any attempts of diplomacy or discretion. It's a tale of terrible dice rolls, fancy divine abilities, and lots of nuts.
Episode S3.27: No Pixies No Problems
Fri, 14 Feb 2025 05:55:00 -0500
The gang continues with the destruction of the pixie menace. It's a tale of casual cheating, more flammable pixies, and looting for fun and profit.
Episode S3.28: Nearly 70% Pixie Safe
Fri, 28 Feb 2025 05:55:00 -0500
The gang is asked to help the pixies find freedom but struggle with getting ahead. It's a tale of poor microphone pickup, strange noises from our adjoining building, and pop-top pixies.
Episode S3.29: Redcap Reckoning
Fri, 14 Mar 2025 05:55:00 -0400
The gang finally gets to the root of the problem and solves it the only way they know how. It's a tale of redcap boot fights, fae breeding rituals, and a pixie peace whistle.
Fri, 28 Mar 2025 05:55:00 -0400
The gang reaps the rewards of a job... well, done. Then on to the next ambush! It's a tale of new bacon flavored friends, a poorly disguised ambush, and one dead cleric.