STI demonstration

Tue, 11 Nov 2025 00:03:33 GMT

I was just on this campus. I can't believe this happened. My daughter said she wants to go here because it's close to home. I think I want her to go to that school in Southern California now.

STI

Sat, 01 Nov 2025 20:18:03 GMT

I was really excited when my daughter told me she wanted to go to STI until I found out they'd be using our new X-100 to trick students into donating kidneys to help pay for tuition. I hope she decides to go to that school in Southern California she was talking about.

Best Friday Ever

Sat, 25 Oct 2025 19:25:31 GMT

This is the day that changed the rest of my life.

We took technology way too far

Sat, 11 Oct 2025 17:07:20 GMT

I'm riding in an autocab on the way to The Red Door Tavern when I have this piece of scrap metal asking me if I want a conversation. I think we took this technology shit way too far.

Things to remember when traveling to Chicago in 2048

Fri, 10 Oct 2025 22:53:03 GMT

I just seen this commercial and I thought it was spot on showing life in 2048 Chicago.

Big Cigs

Sat, 04 Oct 2025 18:16:39 GMT

The only thing that gets me through the day is having a pack of Big Cigs in my van. Maybe I should limit my habits to caffeine and alcohol.

Rude little sh#t!

Sat, 27 Sep 2025 19:21:48 GMT

I just wanted to go to Matooshe's for my breakfast burrito and this rude little shit wanted to snuff me out. Oh well, that's 2048 in America.

I hate being monitored.

Sat, 13 Sep 2025 18:41:23 GMT

It's the day after Thanksgiving, and I'm a bit hungover when my daughter Pepper calls. She always makes me feel better. Our conversation is going great until the phone provider tells us our call is being monitored for quality assurance. Now we have to be careful, because the government is listening. Pepper, please save your honesty for another time.

Pepper

Fri, 29 Aug 2025 21:25:23 GMT

My daughter is probably the only reason I still give a shit about living. She lifts me up every time I talk to her and she's the only reason why I'm not still mad at my ex-wife. She helped decorate my divorced dad bachelor pad so it's not four tan walls, a couch,1 and a wall screen.

BestSelf is the final destination

Fri, 22 Aug 2025 21:37:59 GMT

BestSelf is where I finish most days. It's depressing most of the time because when I take the parts there, they usually don't get reattached to the people that lost them to begin with. I mean, in 2048 it's pretty expensive to get a limb reattached if you don't have good insurance. Most insurance policies only cover the first 10 thousand, and who has that?

SUVs do cost an arm and a leg.

Fri, 18 Jul 2025 20:51:01 GMT

Our X-25 is the most brilliant piece of equipment Speedfitters has. My company installed the X-25 at Ken Barac's new and used car. They love it because it allows many more customers to make a down payment on a new or used car. And I love it because it separates arms or legs without an ounce of blood being spilled.

Basically, someone goes to Ken Barac's, finds a new or used car they like and if they don't have enough for the down payment, the salesperson asks if they'd like to use an arm or leg for the downpayment.

The X-25 is always full of limbs when I show up on Wednesdays for my service check on the machine.

Jerry Reader, the sales manager, keeps bugging me for a kidney chopper, telling me they have the need. And I must agree because that damned X-25 is always full of limbs when I do my checks.

I just think it sucks that in 2048 America people have to cut off a limb just to afford a new vehicle. And now I'll have to learn how to service the X-30, which is the kidney separation unit. I better stop calling it a "kidney chopper" or the front office will have my ass.

I wish I could've reattached that girl's arm.

Thu, 10 Jul 2025 22:23:50 GMT

I guess I shouldn't bitch about my job too much, because it's the only one that lets me smoke (and sneak a drink). I really wish I could've saved that girl's arm for reattachment--at least I saved her life.

"C" students don't have much choice.

Thu, 10 Jul 2025 22:14:38 GMT

You'll find out why I chose to work for Speedfitters. Well, I really didn't have much of a choice because I was a "C" student that barely graduated. My choices were: police officer, corrections officer, or soldier.

Don't Judge Me

Thu, 10 Jul 2025 21:57:45 GMT

Pretty crazy picture, huh? I would say not to judge me until you know me. This will give you an idea how much my job sucks working for Speedfitters. Just for your info, I didn't cash in on the blind guy's parts, even though it would've been easy to. Being the nice guy that day cost me 200 bucks.

My Crazy Job

Thu, 10 Jul 2025 21:19:03 GMT

I'm gonna tell you what a parts reclamation agent does, which is my job. You probably think you have a F-ed up job. And maybe you do. But mine I'm guessing is worse.

I show up at an accident scene before an ambulance at an accident scene and decide if a victim's arm or leg is reattached based on their insurance.

Basically, if you don't have money to get your arm or leg stitched back on, they get sold off and you receive a Speedfitter's prosthetic.