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"Saint" Nick and the Big F*ck Up



Comedy Audio Book


Synopsis:

“Saint” Nick and the Big F*ck Up is a hilarious, heartbreaking, and heartwarming Christmas audio drama in six parts about a part-time mall Santa’s ability to mess everything up, written and performed by Phil Rickaby. Nick is a part-time mall Santa, who really hates Christmas. And with good reason. But here he is, on Christmas Eve, wearing the red suit. He shouldn’t be working today, but he is. And he’s about to meet a terrible child who will ruin everything. This is not going to end well. But what’s about to happen, isn’t the worst thing he’s ever done…


Format: Audio Book

Genres: Comedy, Slice of life

Not tagged: [Continuity] [Voices] [Maturity] [Creator demographics] [Character demographics] [Country of origin] [Transcript] [Completion status] [Content warnings]

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Episodes:

Chapter 1: Nick

Tue, 17 Nov 2020 06:30:55 -0000

Meet Nick, World Champion f*ckup full time, asshole, part time mall Santa, who hates Christmas, and with good reason. He’s stuck working on Christmas Eve, the worst day of the year to be working as Santa. It’s about to get worse: a child named Preston is about to make an impact.

“Saint” Nick and the Big F*ck Up is written and performed by Phil Rickaby.

Use the hashtag #saintnickeffedup to share on Twitter and Instagram.

Music in this episode were excerpts from: “Krampus Workshop” Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

“Jingle Bells” Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Some sound effects from zapsplat.com

Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/snatbfu

“Saint” Nick and the Big F*ck Up by Phil Rickaby is licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 4.0. To view a copy of this license, visit https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/4.0

Direct MP3 link


Chapter 2: Being Santa / Nick’s F*ck Up

Tue, 24 Nov 2020 06:54:16 -0000

Being a mall Santa is hard work – harder than you might think. There’s a lot to know, such as what not to eat. Nick learned on the job, a trial by fire, full of screaming children, piss, and vomit.

And there was that brief time – the only time – when Nick actually liked Christmas, but he screwed that up, about as epically as you can!

“Saint” Nick and the Big F*ck Up is written and performed by Phil Rickaby.

Use the hashtag #saintnickeffedup to share on Twitter and Instagram.

Music in this episode were excerpts from: “Krampus Workshop” Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

“Oh Christmas Tree” Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

“There is Romance” – Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

“Jingle Bells” Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Some sound effects from zapsplat.com

Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/snatbfu

“Saint” Nick and the Big F*ck Up by Phil Rickaby is licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 4.0. To view a copy of this license, visit https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/4.0

Direct MP3 link


Chapter 3: The First Patron Principle

Tue, 01 Dec 2020 06:13:46 -0000

There is a unique flow to each day the mall. Anyone who has ever worked in a mall knows it, and how the first patron in a store sets the tone for the day, and at no time is the First Patron Principle more noticeable than during the Christmas season.

Preston continues his meltdown, and his mother makes an unreasonable demand.

Nick deals with the fallout of his f*ck up.

“Saint” Nick and the Big F*ck Up is written and performed by Phil Rickaby.

Use the hashtag #saintnickeffedup to share on Twitter and Instagram.

Music in this episode were excerpts from: “Krampus Workshop” Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

“Angels We Have Heard on High” Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

“A Very Brady Special” – Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Some sound effects from zapsplat.com

Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/snatbfu

“Saint” Nick and the Big F*ck Up by Phil Rickaby is licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 4.0. To view a copy of this license, visit https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/4.0

Direct MP3 link


Chapter 4: Thanks, Real Beard Santa

Tue, 08 Dec 2020 07:09:34 -0000

The Christmas season was the worst time of the year. As soon as the Santa Claus parade was done, Nick knew that on Monday, his torments would begin. It didn’t help that his mother insisted on taking him to get his picture taken with every mall Santa in town. He hated that. But there was that one Santa….

In the face of Preston’s mother and her unreasonable demand, Nick snaps.

Filled with regret for missing out on his daughter’s life, Nick comes up with a plan to do something…good.

“Saint” Nick and the Big F*ck Up is written and performed by Phil Rickaby.

Use the hashtag #saintnickeffedup to share on Twitter and Instagram.

Music in this episode were excerpts from: “Krampus Workshop” Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

“Jingle Bells” Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

“There is Romance” – Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Some sound effects from zapsplat.com

Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/snatbfu

“Saint” Nick and the Big F*ck Up by Phil Rickaby is licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 4.0. To view a copy of this license, visit https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/4.0

Direct MP3 link


Chapter 5: Santa Is Feeding His Reindeer

Tue, 15 Dec 2020 06:36:29 -0000

There was a time before Nick hated Christmas. A time before “little Santa Claus”, before the torments of his classmates. It was short lived, but it was wonderful; for that brief time there was magic in the world.

So what makes a guy who has hated Christmas his whole life decide to be Santa at the local mall? Hope.

“Saint” Nick and the Big F*ck Up is written and performed by Phil Rickaby.

Use the hashtag #saintnickeffedup to share on Twitter and Instagram.

Music in this episode were excerpts from: “Krampus Workshop” Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

“Angels We Have Heard On High” Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

“Wholesome” Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

“There is Romance” – Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Some sound effects from zapsplat.com

Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/snatbfu

“Saint” Nick and the Big F*ck Up by Phil Rickaby is licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 4.0. To view a copy of this license, visit https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/4.0

Direct MP3 link


Chapter 6: “Saint” Nick Steps Up

Tue, 22 Dec 2020 06:44:33 -0000

Storming away from the castle, still wearing his Santa costume, Nick thinks of someone he hasn’t thought of in years: his father, and comes to a realization about his mother in the process.

Nick takes a big step, and makes a big change. And for him, Christmas will never be the same.

“Saint” Nick and the Big F*ck Up is written and performed by Phil Rickaby. Use the hashtag #saintnickeffedup to share on Twitter and Instagram.

Music in this episode were excerpts from: “Krampus Workshop” Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

“Angels We Have Heard On High” Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

“There is Romance” – Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

“A Very Brady Special” – Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Some sound effects from zapsplat.com

Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/snatbfu

“Saint” Nick and the Big F*ck Up by Phil Rickaby is licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 4.0. To view a copy of this license, visit https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/4.0

Direct MP3 link