KSTB- Kingdom of Stonetree Broadcasting
65 episodes
Web <link> from RSS feed:
https://kstb-kingdom-of-stonetree-broadcasting.castos.com
Database link:
https://kstb-kingdom-of-stonetree-broadcasting.castos.com/
RSS Feed:
https://kstb-kingdom-of-stonetree-broadcasting.castos.com/feed
Creator: Arenthaer Gald
Full cast Fantasy Anthology Audio Drama
Synopsis:
Kingdom of Stonetree Broadcasting is a radio station serving a fantasy kingdom called Stonetree. Here, you can hear samples of the programming they broadcast, whether it's ad breaks, news, or talk or informational programming. Direct any inquiries to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Format: Audio Drama
Continuity: Anthology
Writing: Scripted
Voices: Full cast
Genres: Fantasy, Comedy, Adventure
Framing device: Show within a show
Maturity: All audience
Completion status: Not applicable
Not tagged: [Creator demographics] [Character demographics] [Country of origin] [Transcript] [Content warnings]
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Episodes:
MAGICAL DIFFICULTIES- PLEASE STAND BY
Wed, 15 Jan 2025 07:00:00 +0000
WE SEEM TO BE EXPERIENCING SOME MAGICAL DIFFICULTIES- NORMAL PROGRAMMING WILL RESUME AS SOON AS THE ONLY PERSON WHO REALLY KNOWS HOW IT WORKS REGAINS CONSIOUSNESS.
To complain about this interruption in programming, please email arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Sun, 22 Dec 2024 03:03:37 +0000
It's a surprise holiday message, and a visit from our local creator diety! Happy Midwinter Everyone!
Sir Gwythir Owain vs. The Frost Lich
Sun, 15 Dec 2024 07:00:00 +0000
Sir Gwythir Owain, noble knight and adventurer, prefers not to make elaborate plans. He likes to practice what he thinks of as "Improv Adventuring". It's not like playing an improv game with your amateur dramatics society, and none of the villians or monsters are going to "yes, and..." your plans. In fact, sometimes even if it works it goes completely sideways, like what happens when we join Sir Gwythir Owain today, when the Heroes of Stonetree Broadcasting encounter an unexpected foe...
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Gilroy of Stalmvor: Do No Harm
Fri, 15 Nov 2024 07:00:00 +0000
It can be a tough life for an adventuring cleric. Adventuring is, in and of itself, a violent profession. How do you balance that with a healer's oath to do no harm? Gilroy of Stalmvor has spent a lot of time thinking about this, and this week, on Kingdom of Stonetree Broadcasting, he'll share the answers he's arrived at.
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Verhaalgard Ventures: Hyland Hijinks
Tue, 15 Oct 2024 06:00:00 +0000
Sightseeing can be hard, especially when some of the sights to see are in cities that you have been banished from on pain of death. That's why, on this Verhaalgard Ventures, the Heroes of Stonetree Broadcasting will be guiding you on an audio tour of the City of Hyland. Sir Gwythir Owin and Alias are from Hyland, so they've got this under control, right? It'll be fine.
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Theobore the Barbarian has an Axe to Grind with Adventuring Parties
Sun, 15 Sep 2024 06:00:00 +0000
They talk alot about the camaraderie that develops between adventurers. Bands of boon companions, having a grand time while fighting for their lives against monsters. You know what doesn't get talked about as much? How much your fellow adventurers are going to piss you off sometimes. Luckily for us, Theobore Bloodaxe is willing to talk about it, at length, because this month, Theobore the Barbarian has an Axe to Grind with Adventuring Parties!
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Heroes of Stonetree Broadcasting- Setting Out
Thu, 15 Aug 2024 06:00:00 +0000
The adventure is about to begin, but it can't begin properly without everyone spending a bunch of time buying the equipment that they may or may not need. This week, join the Heroes of Stonetree Broadcasting as they have a shopping episode!
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Stonetree Afternoon News Dispatch: Good News/Bad News
Mon, 15 Jul 2024 06:00:00 +0000
Do you want the good news or bad news first? Not that you have a choice, since I couldn't hear your answer anyway, and the parts of this that were recorded, while they were live at the time, aren't live now. So I'm afraid you'll have to take the news in the order that I already did it in. Sorry.
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
CWC Class of 1324 Commencement Speech
Sat, 15 Jun 2024 06:00:00 +0000
Arenthaer Gald has been asked to give a speech at the Ceallach Wizard College Class of 1324 graduation. Apparently the goal of these speeches is to give advice to the new grads. But when it came time to write, all Arenthaer could think about was how nearly any piece of advice he could think of would only be relevant to some of the grads. This is what he came up with.
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Special thanks this month to Baz Luhrmann, who did the song I'm parodying, and also to Mary Schmich, whose essay provided the words for that song.
Archer Blackwood, Corpsefinder: Most Dangerous Game
Wed, 15 May 2024 06:00:00 +0000
On this week's installment of ARCHER BLACKWOOD: CORPSEFINDER, the clever cleric engages in a deadly game of cat and mouse with a member of Hyland's notorious guild of assassins, The Hyland Society for the Gentlemen of the Hunt! Can the gnome with the nose for the no longer living find the body and foil the assassin's plans within the three day ressurection window? Find out! By listening to this episode! Right Now!
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Foresight with Finola Vance: Adventure Calling
Mon, 15 Apr 2024 06:00:00 +0000
It's an uncertain world out there, and it's not always (if it ever is) clear what actions you should take to achive your goals. That's why you should call in to Foresight with Finola Vance, and let our wonderful weathergirl, the marvelous meteorastrologer, use her fortune telling abilities to help you divine the correct path!
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Fri, 15 Mar 2024 06:00:00 +0000
One of the things every visitor to Stonetree should see is Stonetree Keep! Not that you could avoid seeing it, it towers over the city, but I also mean the inside! And once inside, why not take the Stonetree Keep Audio Tour, to get trivia and fun facts about the things you'll see on your visit to the Keep! IMPORTANT NOTE: When visiting Stonetree Keep, it is important to stick to the publically accessible areas, as wandering off can be dangerous.
Headphones Reccomended.
Thu, 15 Feb 2024 07:00:00 +0000
There's a big festival today in Inaldor Springs! What's it all about, and why is everyone up so early? Let's find out!
Mon, 15 Jan 2024 07:00:00 +0000
They told you not to wear that suspicious amulet, but what did you do? You knew you shouldn't have upset that sorceror, and you still did it. You were warned against trying that back alley potion, and here you are. Cursed. Whatever caused it, you've contracted a magical malady of some kind. What do you do next? Visit a cleric of Nissana like Ailsa Runebreak, an expert in Foiling Curses! Today, Ailsa provides an example of what goes into breaking a curse, on Kingdom of Stonetree Broadcasting!
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Tome of Titans: In Our Own Backyard
Fri, 15 Dec 2023 07:00:00 +0000
The wilds are full of dangerous creatures and horrible monsters, but there are also stange and deadly beasts right here at home in Stonetree! Today, on Tome of Titans, learn about what strange entities lurk in our own backyards!
Tales from the Late Rose: Islwyn the Incredible
Wed, 15 Nov 2023 07:00:00 +0000
We've all heard of the Legendary wizard Islwyn the Incredible, but how much do we really know? And did you know that he is, somehow, still alive? Today, we visit the Late Rose Retired Adventurer's Community and talk to the oldest person on Verhaalgard about his early life, if he can remember any of it.
Sun, 15 Oct 2023 06:00:00 +0000
Despite his best efforts, Arenthaer continues to travel. This time he needs to go get an award in far Voronnin in the north, and is going via Affiliated Gates! Gate travel is the convienient way to get across the continent in a hurry, so let's see how it goes!
From The Casebooks Of Faustian D'Azoral- Custom Tailored Lawsuit
Fri, 15 Sep 2023 06:00:00 +0000
Faustian D'Azoral, Warlock at Law, is not an adventurer, so it is his custom to avoid becoming contractually obligated to do adventures. But, of course, contracts are no obstacle to Verhaalgard's Greatest Warlock/Attorney! And once you wrangle the contract, the adventure is easy peasy. Find out how, on this episode From the Casebooks of Faustian D'Azoral!
Arenthaer Gald on Vacation: To the Mooon!
Tue, 15 Aug 2023 06:00:00 +0000
As a desperate last ditch effort to find somewhere to relax, Arenthaer resorts to a drastic course of action. He and Finola will boldly go where no Verhaalgard native has gone before, to set foot on the Moon! Let's just see how that works out for him.
Arenthaer Gald on Vacation: Remote Mountaintop
Sat, 15 Jul 2023 06:00:00 +0000
Getting a bit sick of interruptions, Arenthaer takes his vacation to a remote peak in the Solvaelk Mountains. There's nothing alive for miles, and from up here, he should be able to see anything well before it can annoy him, right?
Arenthaer Gald on Vacation: Luxury Cruise
Thu, 15 Jun 2023 06:00:00 +0000
Determined to enjoy his vacation, Arenthaer Gald has set out to sea on a luxury cruise! Becasue the sea is definitley always a safe and relaxing place... right?
Arenthaer Gald on Vacation: Treehouse Resort
Mon, 15 May 2023 06:00:00 +0000
Arenthaer is still trying to enjoy his vacation by getting away from it all, or rather, above it all in a Treehouse Resort near Iorwerth. Surely nothing could go wrong so high up in the trees, right?
Arenthaer Gald on Vacation: A Secluded Castle
Sat, 15 Apr 2023 06:00:00 +0000
Arenthaer is continuing his vacation, but is currently stranded in a secluded castle. A country manor house that a storm prevents anyone from leaving? It'll be fine. Probably.
Arenthaer Gald on Vacation: The Beach
Wed, 15 Mar 2023 06:00:00 +0000
Arenthaer has never taken a vacation. He needs a break, and he's going to take it. For the next six months or so, tune in for brief vacation updates, as Arenthaer tries desparatley to enjoy his time off, and tries to avoid getting involved in too many adventures!
Arnbjorg's Home for Orphaned Familiars
Wed, 15 Feb 2023 07:00:00 +0000
Wizard's have magical assistants that help them cast spells and stuff. These usually take the form of animals, like cats, owls, toads, and ravens, but most any animal could be a familiar. And what happens to them when their wizard dies? Find out today, as we take a little tour of Arnbjorg's Home for Orphaned Familiars!
Foresight with Finola Vance: Inadvisable Advice
Sun, 15 Jan 2023 07:00:00 +0000
It's a tough world out there. Things are scary, and the scariest thing of all is uncertainty. So if you are uncertain, call in to ask Finola Vance, and get future insights to your present problems! Maybe. If your question makes sense and it wouldn't be unethical to tell you the answer. On this episode: Life advice for the young from the technically younger, the source of the sense of impending doom, and a mobid question that takes a turn, on Foresight with Finola Vance!
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Verhaalgard Ventures - Faolan: Midwinter Wonderland
Thu, 15 Dec 2022 07:00:00 +0000
Wintertime is not the ideal time to travel, but for some places, it's totally worth it to visit during the colder months. Places like Faolan, home of the winter elves. Actually, I think it might just be Faolan, and to find out why, listen to this month's Verhaalgard Ventures!
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Archer Blackwood- Murder in the Manor to Which They Have Become Accustomed
Tue, 15 Nov 2022 07:00:00 +0000
On this week's installment of ARCHER BLACKWOOD: CORPSEFINDER, the clever cleric must face a danger unlike any he's faced before. (Super obnoxious rich people.) Can the gnome with the nose for the no longer living find the body and clear the good name of the accused murderer, Sir Gwythir Owain? Find out! By listening to this episode! Right Now!
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Sat, 15 Oct 2022 06:00:00 +0000
Did you know that the Blood Moon Convergence is a natural source of free (unclean, necromantic) energy? Necromancers like Erdan Gald are working to harness this power for the betterment of Verhaalgard. Hopfully nothing goes wrong...
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Artifacts Roadshow: Not Technically Cursed
Thu, 15 Sep 2022 06:00:00 +0000
There are curses and there are not curses, you know? Like... One mans curse could be another's blessing, or vice versa. And not all curses are of a strictly magical nature, and some are intensely personal. That's the kind of thing we examine on today's Artifacts Roadshow!
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Stonetree Relaxation Soundscapes
Mon, 15 Aug 2022 06:00:00 +0000
Everyone needs to chill sometimes, but on the road when you are adventuring, it's hard. So Kingdom of Stonetree Broadcasting is happy to provide this valuable lesson on how to relax. Enjoy three instances showcasing the tranquility to be experienced all across Verhaalgard.
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Don't Do Crimes - The Greenscale Heist
Fri, 15 Jul 2022 06:00:00 +0000
Alias the Thief is a veritable treasure trove of information on why crime is a bad idea, and nothing illustrates that quite like this story. Here's a tip: you need a really really good plan to steal from a dragon. Alias does not have even a kind of good plan. And yet... parts of the story sound a bit... familiar...
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Sir Gwythir Owain versus the Greenscale Terror
Wed, 15 Jun 2022 06:00:00 +0000
It's a brand new tale from our Favorite Noble Knight and Adventurer(TM), featuring dragons, maidens, and the seeming rescue therof. It's everything you want in a chivalric tale, but for some reason, it seems like he doesn't tell this one quite as often. I can't imagine why...
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Verhaalgard Ventures - There's No Place Like Holme
Sun, 15 May 2022 06:00:00 +0000
Had a little too much adventure? Need a place to get away from it all? Are you under 4 feet tall or have a really thick skull? (Please note that I am not asking if you are stupid, I am actually referring to cranial resilience.) On this Verhaalgard Ventures we visit Holme, one of the major halfling towns, with Theobore Bloodaxe, Barbarian Hero!
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Modern Magic- The Undead Symphony
Fri, 15 Apr 2022 06:00:00 +0000
Erdan Gald the Necromantic Conductor has been touring his Undead Orchestra for years, and just recently decided to push the necromantic envelope, by expanding it into an Undead Symphony! On this Modern Magic, we visit with him on just how he achieved that feat.
Special thanks and apologies to Modest Petrovich Mussorgsky (1839-1881), the earth elemental who composed this weeks feature music, Night on Bald Mountain. Also thanks to www.musopen.org for providing it to us!
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Note: I did notice that "Orchestra" and "Symphony" have slightly different definitions on Verhallgard from the Elemental Plane of Earth. Dimensions are weird!
From The Casebooks Of Faustian D'Azoral- The Devil Went Down To Stonetree
Tue, 15 Mar 2022 06:00:00 +0000
Faustian D'Azoral is many things, but there are also many things he is not. Faustian D'Azoral is not a lip reader, a musician, or a gambler. Oh, he'll play games of chance, but is it really gambling when winning is a foregone conclusion? Find out, with an example From the Casebooks of Faustian D'Azoral!
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Artifacts Roadshow: Does What it Says on the Tin
Tue, 15 Feb 2022 07:00:00 +0000
Artifacts Roadshow is back to illuminate the magical properties and histories of more magic items! What magic could these weapons used in a crime have? Is your family heirloom valuable? What were those boots made for, and what do they do? And how much is it all worth? Find out!
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Theobore the Barbarian has an Axe to Grind with: Traps!
Sat, 15 Jan 2022 16:52:00 +0000
Theobore Bloodaxe is in a rage about a recent quest he went on. Is it wizards, bad manners, or not fighting that makes him so mad? Yes to all of those. But most of all, this week, Theobore the Barbarian has an Axe to Grind with... Traps!
Foresight with Finola Vance #3
Wed, 15 Dec 2021 07:00:00 +0000
Anxious? Afraid? In an existential crisis? Get advice about the future from Finola Vance, instead of just the weather. This time, dating advice for the short, adventuring advice for the inexperienced, and harvest advice for people who don't listen properly. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Archer Blackwood- Corpsefinder
Mon, 15 Nov 2021 07:00:00 +0000
An Adventurer's Insurance Policy means that someone will come to ressurect you if you die on a quest, but if you think about it, finding your mangled corpse is like a quest in and of itself! This week we follow tracker cleric Archer Blackwood as he searches for a body some would prefer remain missing!
Seija's Alchemical Tutorial- Make Haste
Fri, 15 Oct 2021 06:00:00 +0000
Ever wish you were faster? Not blinding speed, but like... 40% faster? Well you're in luck, assuming you tune in to this episode of Seija's Alchemical Tutorial! Learn alongside this week's novice alchemist, Finola Vance!
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Modern Magic- The Silent Plate Armor
Wed, 15 Sep 2021 06:00:00 +0000
Sir Gwythir Owain is one of the last people you'd expect to be on the forefront of magical research. But he is! Kinda. In that he was the impetus for other people to do magical research. That's what we explore this week on Modern Magic!
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
From The Casebooks Of Faustian D'Azoral- Party's Over
Sun, 15 Aug 2021 06:00:00 +0000
Adventuring parties are built on trust. You gotta be sure that your boon companions won't stab you in the back and make off with your share. Faustian D'Azoral, Warlock at Law, has thoughts about this dynamic, and is willing to share them with you today, with an example from his casebook!
Verhaalgard Ventures - The Fangwind Fleet
Thu, 15 Jul 2021 12:24:00 +0000
Perhaps you live in a landlocked country. Maybe you've never seen the sea. Not to worry, becasue on this Verhaalgard Venture, we visit the orcs of the Fangwind Fleet, a nomadic, seagoing people. You can learn all about orc culture and cooking, and find out just what is up with orc dentists. There's adventure on the high seas, on this Verhaalgard Venture!
Sir Gwythir Owain vs. The Cockatrice of Brastondell
Tue, 15 Jun 2021 12:23:00 +0000
I had planned a full interview with Hans Vanderson about his live show, but he... had to go... So instead, please enjoy this prerecorded program, Sir Gwythir Owain versus the Cockatrice of Brastondell, on the off chance that you haven't already heard Sir Gwythir tell this story dozens of times...
Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Sat, 15 May 2021 12:23:00 +0000
Thinking of committing a crime in Stonetree? Maybe think twice about that, or something like this could happen... to YOU! Listen to this hardened criminal describing the sort of thing that happens in the seedy underworld of our beloved fantasy kingdom. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Theobore the Barbarian has an Axe to Grind with: Bandits!
Thu, 15 Apr 2021 12:23:00 +0000
Theobore Bloodaxe, most famous halfling barbarian on Verhaalgard, gets pretty angry about things. That's what makes him a barbarian. If you manage to set him off, look out! This week on KSTB we've got a sort of controlled detonation, since we sat down to talk to Theobore about what really pisses him off. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Verhaalgard Ventures - Caellach
Mon, 15 Mar 2021 06:02:27 +0000
Stuck at home? Not the adventurous or traveling sort? Not to worry! KSTB is taking you along on journeys to destinations around Verhaalgard, starting with Caellach! We'll look at the famous college town through three lenses, food, art, and adventure! Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Mon, 15 Feb 2021 07:06:09 +0000
A typical news break on a radio station in a Fantasy Kingdom called Stonetree. Learn about new regulations on dangerous magical weapons, get some good reasons to be careful and cautious, and hear about a weird dream I had. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Fri, 15 Jan 2021 07:02:56 +0000
Get advice about the future from Finola Vance, instead of just the weather. This time, a young mother seeks an auspicious name for her child, a grifter tries to take the gamble out of gambling, and agoraphobic dwarf looks at his job prospects. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Tue, 15 Dec 2020 07:11:57 +0000
Have you found treasure, and been like "Huh, I have no idea what this is, and no way of finding out?" Maybe you should try and get on an episode of Artifacts Roadshow, where our resident treasure expert will identify all your family heirlooms or stuff you've looted or stolen. It's probably not worth much though. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Sun, 15 Nov 2020 07:21:49 +0000
This is the second episode posted today, so make sure to check the earlier one! In honor of our year anniversary of sharing these snippets from an otherworldly radio station, here's a little something different: some of our early ads with all the parts switched around. Did you know we have a twitter, where you could, in theory, follow us for updates? We do! @arenthaer on twitter! And we also have a redbubble shop, if you wanted to wear our logo on a shirt or something! redbubble.com/people/arenthaer
Sun, 15 Nov 2020 07:07:07 +0000
A typical commercial break on a radio station in a Fantasy Kingdom called Stonetree. In this set of fantastical ads we learn what clothes to wear, where to get them cleaned, where we can get an education, and what to do if you get stabbed at home or need to go to the bathroom when traveling. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Thu, 15 Oct 2020 06:01:37 +0000
Arm yourself with knowledge before adventuring out into the wilds, by listening to The Tome of Titans! In this episode we encounter monsters that are legenday, bizzare, deadly, and surprising, in that order. Fair warning: things get loud.
Tue, 15 Sep 2020 06:39:10 +0000
It's lunchtime in Stonetree, and everyone is getting all indecisive about where to eat. Luckily, KSTB has put together this handy guide on some of the tasty, or at least interesting, restaurant options available.
Sat, 15 Aug 2020 06:37:23 +0000
It's time for something educational! You (yes you) (actually no, probably not you, but maybe someone) can learn how to prepare a couple of simple and useful magical potions. KSTB accepts no responsibility for the results and side effects of any potion you might prepare. Do not attempt without direct supervision from a qualified alchemist.
Wed, 15 Jul 2020 06:01:04 +0000
A typical commercial break on a radio station in a Fantasy Kingdom called Stonetree. You'll learn where to go for fine jewelry, about the plight of majestic (and tropical) animals, some of the dos and don'ts of making wishes, and what you need in the way of life insurance and home security. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
From The Casebooks Of Faustian D'Azoral
Mon, 15 Jun 2020 06:14:41 +0000
All your questions about Faustian D'Azoral answered! How does he work cases? What kinds of deals does he make? How does his dog smell? What is his shoe size? Wait... not that one. Some of your questions answered, in this adventure, From the casebooks of Faustian D'Azoral!
Fri, 15 May 2020 06:01:25 +0000
Get advice about the future from Finola Vance, instead of just the weather. In this episode a halfling is nervous about his upcoming wedding , a mysterious stranger wants advice on a non specific job, and a young person looks for career advice. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Wed, 15 Apr 2020 06:08:51 +0000
A typical commercial break on a radio station in a Fantasy Kingdom called Stonetree. You'll learn where to go to get that barbarian battlefield bod, or armor to cover it up, where you can leave your valuables, and who can help you move them, and about damages that you may be entitled to. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Sun, 15 Mar 2020 06:01:18 +0000
A typical news break on a radio station in a Fantasy Kingdom called Stonetree. You'll learn what scams are going around, about educational opportunities for the whole family, and current events in local archaeology. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Kingdom of Stonetree Broadcasting Ads 4
Sat, 15 Feb 2020 21:52:56 +0000
A typical commercial break on a radio station in a Fantasy Kingdom called Stonetree. You'll learn where to get lunch, about a hot business opportunity, what to do if your familiar seems sad, which supposedly hot business opportunities to avoid, and where to go to get your teeth cleaned. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Wed, 15 Jan 2020 06:44:53 +0000
A typical commercial break on a radio station in a Fantasy Kingdom called Stonetree. You'll learn about career opportunities for 10 year olds, what to eat in dungeons and caves, how to tell if your magic items are safe to use, where to get companionship (not like that), and the details for the hot ticket event of the season. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Kingdom of Stonetree Broadcasting Ads 2
Sun, 15 Dec 2019 17:31:07 +0000
A typical commercial break on a radio station in a Fantasy Kingdom called Stonetree. You'll find out which about historical tours you can take, what tests you should subject your romantic partners to, where to buy the best shoes, and which inn is recommended by a celebrity. There's also a Public Service Announcement from the Stonetree Association for Public Health. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Kingdom of Stonetree Broadcasting Ads 1
Fri, 15 Nov 2019 00:23:00 +0000
A typical commercial break on a radio station in a Fantasy Kingdom called Stonetree. You'll find out which carpet to buy, where to get swords, potions, or a job, and who to call if you get into legal trouble. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.
Here's the script that was used to create this episode:
Ad #1 Luxury Flying Carpet: The 1319 Alatar Gryphon
(Classy low music)
Announcer: Introducing the all new 1319 Alatar Gryphon- elevating the magic carpet from conveyance (pause) to artform. The Alatar Gryphon, woven from the finest silk and powered by premium spirits from the elemental plane of air, it provides an absolutely smooth ride through any night sky. Starting at just 1199 gold pieces per month and with 0 percent financing for the first 60 months, the question isn't can you afford the 1319 Alatar Gryphon, (pause) but can you afford to be seen flying anything else? Alatar Flying Carpets, made with enchantment. 1199 gold piece per month and 0 percent apr offer based on credit check, not compatible with some other offers, see participating rug merchant for details.
Ad #2 Potion Shop- Seija's Alchemical Emporium
1: - and my elbow's been really bothering me, and I'm pretty sure I've contracted trollpox, and I think these aren't freckles, but a colony of micraoscopic skin pixies, and-
2: (Interspersed) Oh. Uh huh. 11aYeah. You know, if you're so worried about it, why don't we go into Seija's Alchemical Emporium over there?
1: I don't know, do you really think it would help?
2: Absolutely, Seija makes potions and remedies for all kinds of gnarly diseases and conditions. Let's go!
(SFX) Shop Door Bell.
Seija: Welcome to Seija's Alchemical Emporium, what can I help you with today?
1: Well, I've got troll pox, and skin pixies, and Shallbazzars's Disease and my elbows been bothering me and and (wheeze) and asthma.